So I’ve been dating this guy for a month or two now…It’s been a strange relationship. We started dating in August, but he made things official right before Thanksgiving. We started as a weird situationship but got pretty attached to each other. I currently am half living with him, since my apartment situation is a little shitty and he lives in a shared house.
I don’t think that I am an overly jealous person, but it makes me very uncomfortable how he openly talks about his past relationships.
He lost his virginity to a minor (he was 19, but she had lied about it and he freaked out even though it wasn’t that big of a deal) which is frequently brought up as a joke in his friend group. He openly talks about the girls he has made out with while I am there participating in the conversation.
In a very “dumb male” way of course he described what they did and it was just so weird to me.
Another girl he made out with last year acted pretty insane this semester (told him that she was on birth control—I was not at the time—in a “come fuck me no consequences” manner) and also broke into his room and stole his food, and also made group chats with him. She also asked me at a party if she could make out with him...but he doesn't block her because they are still "friends."
One of the girls he’s made out just came back from her study abroad and is really close friends with our group and now hangs out with us. He didn’t tell me they had made out and that she had texted him “heyyyy” the morning she came back until I was drunk, and then I began to overthink it. Now it’s miserable because this girl has done nothing wrong to me, but she’s in my class and around us and I’m uncomfortable.
His best friend is also female, and I love her and don’t want to put a wedge but honestly I think that if she ever wanted to date him he would. They don't necessarily have a past, but he was adamant on her living in a co-op house with him next year and didn't even bring it up as an option to me...He brought me to a date party, and she also came as a date with one of his friends...but my boyfriend and her ended up talking most of the time. They are super close and I feel weird like I'm always stepping in on something.
He hasn’t deleted text messages from these women, and still has things like “you’re so beautiful, I can’t wait to take you out” and “I miss the scent of you on my pillow” and that makes me uncomfortable as well. He doesn’t believe in blocking people either.
I’ve talked to him about some things, but sometimes his friends just bring it up anyways, or a new thing happens. I feel like every other week I find out a new girl he’s made out with or whatever and I don’t know how to react. I don't need him knowing I went through his phone either. The only reason why I did that was because I didn't trust what he was telling me about this girl who just came back from Europe.
Maybe I am a super jealous person. I’m trying to look past this but it just irks me. What should I do? What should I say? Am I valid?
By - Consistent_Break_674
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